Story – 2021, Week 16: Ghost Therapy

Finding inspiration has been difficult lately – that goes for the whole pandemic, if I’m honest. So, when pressed for this one, I went to the (haunted) well that I usually use in October – ghosts. In April. Why not? Long after the fake skeletons are put away, and the fake spider webs are taken down, what happens when you’re still sharing your house with a ghost?

A popup reminder about her next Zoom therapy appointment boinged onto Aileen’s screen and she sighed deeply. She took a deep drink off the cold coffee next to her laptop, cleared her throat, set her features in her practiced Professional Therapist face and clicked the button to join the meeting.

Her picture, of course, and two others appeared on the screen. One, a woman in a lavender sweatshirt, her hair in messy bun, and the other… nothing.

“Hello, Sarah. Good to see you.”

“Hi Doctor,” the woman replied.

“And, Emma, I trust you’re there?”

“Oh, she’s there…” Sarah rolled her eyes.

“Will you let me answer for myself?” came the voice of an old woman. “Do you see what I put up with, doc? Do you see this?”

“What you put up with!” Sarah yelled back.

“Ladies, ladies, please,” Aileen calmed. “Emma,” she addressed the blank window, “How are you doing today?”

“Oh, glorious!” she said sarcastically. “This nimrod keeps pressing my buttons and will not get out of my house!”

“Hard to get out of your house when it doesn’t belong to you anymore. Besides, how can I go out with this pandemic still going on?”

“You don’t have to remind me about the pandemic, missy,” Emma’s voice retorted. “I’d still be living in this place if it weren’t for that stupid Covid…”

“Let’s talk about that,” Aileen tried to steer the conversation. “You’ve been dead, what, six months?”

“October 21st,” the voice said bitterly but got melancholier as she continued, “Alone. In the hospital…”

“Should have haunted there…” Sarah mumbled under her breath.

“I heard that!” Emma boomed. “You see, Doc? You see?”

“Sarah,” Aileen started, “Was that constructive?”

“It’s not constructive for the previous owner to haunt your dream apartment! It’s been six months, Doctor. A ghost is spooky in October, you know? You move in, things go bump, then she shows up and starts criticizing your breakfast, your clothes choice… everything!”

“It’s not my fault she’s a mess!” Emma’s voice commented.

“I tried to be understanding,” she turned her head to look where Emma ostensibly sat. “You died in a horrible way, and I’m really sorry about that. But this…,” she waved at Emma, “you need to cross over already!”

“How am I supposed to do that when you’re hear 24-7?” Emma said.

“It’s a pandemic! Where am I going to go? I have to work from home. Home! My home!”

“It’s still my home, too, missy.”

“Ugh!” Sarah gritted her teeth in frustration and blew a stray hair out of her face. “You’re a doctor of paranormal psychology. Why am I sharing my apartment rent-free? Still?!”

“I understand the frustration on both sides,” Aileen said calmly. “Emma, I’m guessing you’d prefer to move on instead of haunting this place that’s clearly no longer yours.”

“Darn right, toots.”

“Emma’s energy is understandably tied to this place you lived for, what? Twenty years?”

“Twenty-three,” the voice corrected.

“And, Sarah, it’s understandable that you’d want your own space without criticism.”

“I don’t think I’m asking too much…”

“No, but here we are six months after Emma died and she’s still here. You both understand that in October as you near Halloween the veil between this realm and the spirit realm thins… becomes more… permeable.”

“Okay,” Sarah said.

“When Emma passed in the hospital, without anchor, her energy…”

“My ghost.”

“Energy, ghost, spirit, whatever you want to call it, came back to this apartment.”

“Sure,” Sarah said, “That makes sense. But it’s April. Why is she still here?”

Aileen nodded thoughtfully for long moments. “I believe she’s basically… trapped on this side.”

“Trapped?” Emma and Sarah said in unison.

“So, you mean I’m stuck with Miss Sweatpants and sourdough until October?!”

“And I’ve got to put up with this biddy all up in my business?”

“Oh, as if you had any business to get up into! Maybe you’d be nicer if someone got up in your business!”

Aileen felt a blush as Sarah stared agog to the side of the screen where Emma would be sitting. “Ladies,” she said suppressing a smile, “Ladies, let’s get back on track. There’s not a lot of ghost business in April because it’s when the veil is the strongest. I suspect that if Emma were left alone in her house she might find a way to cross over on her own…”

“So, this is my fault?” Sarah asked accusingly.

“No,” Aileen interjected quickly, “It’s no one’s fault. It’s just the situation we’re in. Sarah, do you have an appointment for the vaccine yet?”

“I don’t.”

“She hasn’t even tried!” Emma said.

“Sarah?”

“For your information, Emma, I have been trying. And, in fact, I have an appointment on Friday.”

“Well, hallelujah!” Emma’s voice said. “I’ve only been prodding you since they released it!”

“That’s great news, Sarah,” Aileen said. “That’s a positive note that we’re going to have to leave this session on. I’ll see you both – well, I’ll speak with you both next week the same time?”

“Thanks Doc,” Emma said.

“That works for me,” Sarah said.

A week passed and the popup reminder boinged onto Aileen’s screen. She clicked on the link to join the Zoom meeting and was surprised to see just Sarah sitting there.

“Sarah? Is Emma not joining us today?”

“No, doctor. Emma is gone,” Sarah said and Aileen heard a distinct note of sadness in her voice.

“Gone? When?”

“After I got my shot. I came home and she said, ‘Took you long enough,’” she imitated Emma. “’Glad you’re not going to die like I did’, she said and then… faded away.” Tears welled up in Sarah’s eyes. “Doctor, do you think she was sticking around just to make sure I got the vaccine?”

“I think…” Aileen started but was cut off by a disembodied voice coming from the speakers.

“Nah, I was just there to watch that bum get voted out of office.”

“Well, that tracks,” Sarah said smiling.

“Of course, hon, I wanted you to get the shot,” Emma’s voice said. “Enjoy the place like I did. No, enjoy it more. Also, that guy in 309 has a thing for you. And you should take him up on it – I spied on him and, hubba-hubba, girl!”

“Emma!” Sarah said blushing deeply. But Emma had gone again.

“Well,” Aileen said after a prolonged silence. “I think we’re settled here.”

A popup reminder about her next Zoom therapy appointment boinged onto Aileen’s screen and she sighed deeply. She took a deep drink off the cold coffee next to her laptop, cleared her throat, set her features in her practiced Professional Therapist face and clicked the button to join the meeting.

Her picture, of course, and two others appeared on the screen. One, a woman in a lavender sweatshirt, her hair in messy bun, and the other… nothing.

“Hello, Sarah. Good to see you.”

“Hi Doctor,” the woman replied.

“And, Emma, I trust you’re there?”

“Oh, she’s there…” Sarah rolled her eyes.

“Will you let me answer for myself?” came the voice of an old woman. “Do you see what I put up with, doc? Do you see this?”

“What you put up with!” Sarah yelled back.

“Ladies, ladies, please,” Aileen calmed. “Emma,” she addressed the blank window, “How are you doing today?”

“Oh, glorious!” she said sarcastically. “This nimrod keeps pressing my buttons and will not get out of my house!”

“Hard to get out of your house when it doesn’t belong to you anymore. Besides, how can I go out with this pandemic still going on?”

“You don’t have to remind me about the pandemic, missy,” Emma’s voice retorted. “I’d still be living in this place if it weren’t for that stupid Covid…”

“Let’s talk about that,” Aileen tried to steer the conversation. “You’ve been dead, what, six months?”

“October 21st,” the voice said bitterly but got melancholier as she continued, “Alone. In the hospital…”

“Should have haunted there…” Sarah mumbled under her breath.

“I heard that!” Emma boomed. “You see, Doc? You see?”

“Sarah,” Aileen started, “Was that constructive?”

“It’s not constructive for the previous owner to haunt your dream apartment! It’s been six months, Doctor. A ghost is spooky in October, you know? You move in, things go bump, then she shows up and starts criticizing your breakfast, your clothes choice… everything!”

“It’s not my fault she’s a mess!” Emma’s voice commented.

“I tried to be understanding,” she turned her head to look where Emma ostensibly sat. “You died in a horrible way, and I’m really sorry about that. But this…,” she waved at Emma, “you need to cross over already!”

“How am I supposed to do that when you’re hear 24-7?” Emma said.

“It’s a pandemic! Where am I going to go? I have to work from home. Home! My home!”

“It’s still my home, too, missy.”

“Ugh!” Sarah gritted her teeth in frustration and blew a stray hair out of her face. “You’re a doctor of paranormal psychology. Why am I sharing my apartment rent-free? Still?!”

“I understand the frustration on both sides,” Aileen said calmly. “Emma, I’m guessing you’d prefer to move on instead of haunting this place that’s clearly no longer yours.”

“Darn right, toots.”

“Emma’s energy is understandably tied to this place you lived for, what? Twenty years?”

“Twenty-three,” the voice corrected.

“And, Sarah, it’s understandable that you’d want your own space without criticism.”

“I don’t think I’m asking too much…”

“No, but here we are six months after Emma died and she’s still here. You both understand that in October as you near Halloween the veil between this realm and the spirit realm thins… becomes more… permeable.”

“Okay,” Sarah said.

“When Emma passed in the hospital, without anchor, her energy…”

“My ghost.”

“Energy, ghost, spirit, whatever you want to call it, came back to this apartment.”

“Sure,” Sarah said, “That makes sense. But it’s April. Why is she still here?”

Aileen nodded thoughtfully for long moments. “I believe she’s basically… trapped on this side.”

“Trapped?” Emma and Sarah said in unison.

“So, you mean I’m stuck with Miss Sweatpants and sourdough until October?!”

“And I’ve got to put up with this biddy all up in my business?”

“Oh, as if you had any business to get up into! Maybe you’d be nicer if someone got up in your business!”

Aileen felt a blush as Sarah stared agog to the side of the screen where Emma would be sitting. “Ladies,” she said suppressing a smile, “Ladies, let’s get back on track. There’s not a lot of ghost business in April because it’s when the veil is the strongest. I suspect that if Emma were left alone in her house she might find a way to cross over on her own…”

“So, this is my fault?” Sarah asked accusingly.

“No,” Aileen interjected quickly, “It’s no one’s fault. It’s just the situation we’re in. Sarah, do you have an appointment for the vaccine yet?”

“I don’t.”

“She hasn’t even tried!” Emma said.

“Sarah?”

“For your information, Emma, I have been trying. And, in fact, I have an appointment on Friday.”

“Well, hallelujah!” Emma’s voice said. “I’ve only been prodding you since they released it!”

“That’s great news, Sarah,” Aileen said. “That’s a positive note that we’re going to have to leave this session on. I’ll see you both – well, I’ll speak with you both next week the same time?”

“Thanks Doc,” Emma said.

“That works for me,” Sarah said.

A week passed and the popup reminder boinged onto Aileen’s screen. She clicked on the link to join the Zoom meeting and was surprised to see just Sarah sitting there.

“Sarah? Is Emma not joining us today?”

“No, doctor. Emma is gone,” Sarah said and Aileen heard a distinct note of sadness in her voice.

“Gone? When?”

“After I got my shot. I came home and she said, ‘Took you long enough,’” she imitated Emma. “’Glad you’re not going to die like I did’, she said and then… faded away.” Tears welled up in Sarah’s eyes. “Doctor, do you think she was sticking around just to make sure I got the vaccine?”

“I think…” Aileen started but was cut off by a disembodied voice coming from the speakers.

“Nah, I was just there to watch that bum get voted out of office.”

“Well, that tracks,” Sarah said smiling.

“Of course, hon, I wanted you to get the shot,” Emma’s voice said. “Enjoy the place like I did. No, enjoy it more. Also, that guy in 309 has a thing for you. And you should take him up on it – I spied on him and, hubba-hubba, girl!”

“Emma!” Sarah said blushing deeply. But Emma had gone again.

“Well,” Aileen said after a prolonged silence. “I think we’re settled here.”

Selfie: 2021, Week 16 – Meet Alli!

Please say hi to Allison Lynnette — you can call her Alli.

This little ball of fur and fury turned six months old this month. She’s been part of our fur family now for four of those six months. This selfie was taken in the car after she and I went for a hike at Crane Creek park in Rohnert Park. This picture on the right? Yeah, that’s her on the trail. She looks so cute and calm – tired, maybe? Not even a little. Let me say this: this wasn’t a great walk. What it did, though, is show how far she’s come and how far we have to go.

First, though, how did we get here?

You may remember the Reflection I wrote for Winston after he died. That was a year and a half ago and I’ve missed him every day. I figured I’d get another dog… someday. I had a load of good excuses, but ultimately, I think it all came down to the fact that no dog could live up to Winston. He was that kind of a dog.

When my friend Kirk’s dog, Mishka, went into heat he made the appointment to get her fixed. But that was a week away, and she had already, shall we say, gotten the attention of the neighborhood dogs. One in particular broke out of his house up the street and hid out in the bushes overnight. The next morning when Kirk sent Mishka out to go potty… well, you get it.

Nine puppies survived a rather harrowing birthing. When the runt came out Kirk noted she wasn’t breathing. But there were complications with other puppies and Kirk didn’t have time to work on the apparent still-born. But when he came back a bit later she wasn’t dead, she was nursing. He worked with a service to find homes for all but two. He was going to keep one – a boy puppy he named Ernie. But the runt didn’t have a home.

He’d been sending me pictures since shortly after the puppies were born. They were adorable, of course, but I wasn’t ready. I wasn’t ready…

I can’t tell you exactly what changed. Akilah blames it on the copious rye whiskey David Erik and I imbibed on his porch in late November. I’ll admit two things: one, it was a lot of rye. Two, I did text Kirk that night saying I’d take the runt. But I do know I’d already decided it was time.

It was time.

The next Saturday we drove up to Redding to Kirk’s house and picked her up.

What in the hell had we gotten ourselves into?

I don’t remember much of Winston’s puppy time. Maybe that’s nature repressing those memories? Alli has been… well, she’s not nicknamed “Alligator” for nothing…

Earlier this month she went in to get fixed (or broken) herself. The vet sent her home with a sedative so she wouldn’t get too excited and inadvertently tear a stitch in exuberance. The directions said she could have half or a whole pill every 12 hours. I need to explain that when Alli isn’t sleeping, she’s generally running at 10 out of 10. Full tilt. Ball of fury. Alligator. So we started in on a whole pill. That took from a 10 to… maybe an eight…. Possibly nine.

This one will not be slowed.

She did manage to heal just fine. We’ve had some little walks, and she’s back to playing with her friends. Today was her first hike since surgery. We’ve got a lot work to do…

I’m not a parent, but I imagine a parent can’t help but compare one child to another, even if it’s not something they’d ever speak aloud. Alli is not Winston. Part of that, of course, is comparing a puppy to a 12-year-old dog, but Winston was just a different soul. I get glimpses of what Alli will grow into, and I think she’s going to be a wonderful companion. Not Winston, though.

And that’s okay. The truth is when we picked Alli up, I wasn’t over Winston. But her crazy licking attacks, her adorable pterodactyl-like yawns, the way she talks back when she doesn’t get her way, how she cants her big old floppy ears this way and that… I’m not going to say she has mended a broken heart. That’s trite and overly simplistic. But for all her puppy faults, for all her wackiness, she acts as a contrast to Winston. In the space in my heart reserved for dogs Winston has made space for Alli to come inside and cuddle up; there’s space enough for both of them — the big gentle black lab with some dalmatian spots, and the young tawny puppy with floppy ears and a black nose. Both tails are wagging. Vigorously.

Five Things This Week: 2021, week 15

It’s been a minute since I did one of these! Let’s get into it…

Clickup
It’s productivity software. Understand, “productivity software” in general is to me what kryptonite is to Superman. However, Akilah did some reasearch on various platforms and made the case that such software could help us get back on the creative track. And she’s right. We settled on Clickup, which is online-based and has a mobile version (which isn’t particularly useful, if I’m honest). It’s nice to have a schedule and something to remind me about deadlines.

Fearless (Taylor’s Version) (Spotify link)
Taylor Swift
I’m an unabashed Swiftie, and both of her albums last year, folklore and evermore, were among my favorite albums of the year. Fearless is her re-make of her 2008 album. I don’t know if you’re familiar with the he-said/she-said controversy that led to her project of re-recording her first six albums, but I’d argue it doesn’t matter. This is the first of the albums to be released and I argue it justifies the project no matter the impetus. The recordings are extremely close to the originals, but her voice is better and the instrumentation is – I think – cleaner as well. The original album is significant in that this, her second album, really previewed the immense talent she had for songcraft and would portend the mega-star she’s become. For that reason, I’m glad she chose this album to re-record first and I’d highly recommend it as a place to start if you’re only familiar with her most recent recordings or her controversies.

Glen And Friends Cooking
YouTube
Glen and Friends have gotten me through the pandemic. I first stumbled onto their “1 Gallon Of Beer – Your First HomeBrew Recipe” but that led to so many other inspirations. He’s been posting these charming videos from his studio kitchen in Toronto for more than a decade. The videos are bite sized and run from recreating recipes from ancient cookbooks to making soda pop, curing meat, and trying to create a KFC replica. I guarantee you’ll find something that will make your mouth water, and Glen presents everything in a way that feels very easily approachable and delightful. 

Cautionary Tales – Demonising Dungeons & Dragons
Podcast
Economist and journalist Tim Harford is into the second season of the podcast Cautionary Tales where he stitches together real life incidents to illustrate particular human tendencies. It’s a well-paced and enlightening podcast. Honestly, there’s a number of great episodes I could have chosen such as “Martin Luther King Jr; the Jewelry Genius; and the Art of Public Speaking” or “Fire At The Beverly Hills Supper Club” which I think about almost daily. The episode that dropped today, “Demonising Dungeons & Dragons,” is a great entry. 

Ubiquitous puppy picture
Alli
She graduated beginning puppy training. If I’m honest, it’s because she excelled at some things (focus) even if her excited temperament got the better of her at other skills (loose-leash walking). But, in the spirit of “What do you call the medical student who finished at the bottom of his class? Doctor,” here’s the happy graduate: